Can you feel it? The silence? Perhaps the silence is something only I can feel right now… but… it is there. So much silence. All around. If you switch everything off you will surely hear it – there! That quivering deep within your bones, a strange and familiar feeling, one of being fully exposed to an unyielding power, the circling of a great nothingness all around, a nothingness holding everything in a vast and empty balance; like the moments before a great rush into the unknown, full of expectation. I feel an excitement I can’t explain yet… maybe this thing hasn’t happened yet…
A huge wide space has opened up, a void where usually such a lot of ‘noise’ occupies, suddenly full of new opportunity. Something new is settling. Something great and unseen has been at constant work; a great apocalypse is unfolding, and all earthly and immaterial things are about to be changed under Its dominion.
It feels like many years ago since 2020 started. I was fresh back from the Holy Land, my spiritual path moving steadily upwards to a long-desired summit. And then it all started stopping, at least, for the rest of the world. I had made a mark here, in England, and this is where I would stay for most of 2020, it was already my decision. I was tired of the world, tired of travelling, tired of living ‘out there’ when really all I was craving was to remain ‘inside’, back to my life in-between all possibilities… so I began growing things, gardens I hadn’t had the chance to tend properly for a while, and I heard my calling, I got my messages. Here I would remain for a while, in England, I had been told as much, and I had a mission here. And… then, the world started stopping. Rumours of viruses, borders closing, people had to keep their distance… none of this was especially new to me, and social distancing is something I’ve been practicing for years ! I’ve always been a recluse, except when I am travelling around – that’s always been driven by a different energy and purpose. And we were told to expect a virus way back, it’s been prophesied, as was the outcome of all this. “A virus attacking the lungs that will come in two waves” that was it, I think…
Of course the media would like to have you believe that everybody’s been locked inside, that travel has been impossible, all borders are closed, that dangers are waiting on all corners… please, people have been telling me for years of dangers and I always just seem to walk straight through them unharmed, less than unharmed – I have always been blessed by these dangers. Don’t go here, don’t go there, don’t do this or that, you’re vulnerable, always wear shoes, even indoors. I’m chronically neutropenic, I know well the dangers of viruses and how easy it is for some people to just shake something off in a day that would have me in bed for weeks. But, God has His plans, His devices. I gave my expensive debilitating medicines back to the specialists years ago. If He decides I am to stay among the green hills of England or to go on a mission across the globe, it happens, nothing or no-one can stop it, not even the ‘shutting down’ of the whole world. If He decides that this is to be my end… so be it. And until that day comes, I intent to live fully, no fear… fear brings you nothing. Faith will give you the whole world… even if you don’t want it.
Life, my dear souls, never stopped ! Do not believe everything you hear, the world and its people are more alive now than ever… and your place in the world hasn’t changed, you’re mission and purpose is STILL waiting for you, to grasp it, to let go and run with your one chance at life on earth… before it’s too late.
These past 12 months I have been in and out of Red Zones, crossed the UK border during lockdown, I’ve been to hospitals during the worst part of the crisis, I’ve taken flights across the other side of the world that were never supposed to be possible. I became a God-Father for the first time to one of the most special and favoured people on earth (and I state that will confidence), I turned 30 years old, had a moment of healing in one of my favourite monasteries in the world, stayed in all kinds of places from huts made of cow-dung to luxurious palaces, travelled through the empty Sahara by camel. I received special permission to visit indigenous tribes in East Africa, lived next to the Serengeti for months, had the inner chamber of the Great Pyramid all to myself and entered the lowest chamber of King Tutankhamen’s tomb (forbidden to tourists), danced on top of monuments more than 4000 years old with no-one else around, placed my hand on human footprints in fossilised mud over 20,000 years old, I was pursued by armed guards through the jungle in the middle of the night, woke up to the sounds of lions outside my tent, saw great migrations and travelled through some of earth’s last true wildernesses.
Trees have blossomed and fallen, flowers have come and gone,
seasons have changed, leaves have browned. Earth has seen many suns, many moons.
Life, my dear reader, never stopped. You did.
Am I suggesting you all go book a load of flights and start jet-setting across the world after reading this post? Absolutely not. This is my story, not yours. I haven’t chosen this life for myself, and not for a second should anyone believe another’s life is better or more valuable than their own. If you ever read my posts and feel your own life is somehow inadequate then that is because you are not fulfilling your unique destined purpose. I never planned to travel forever, and in fact I intend not to… but Father’s plan, well… that’s another story… we will see. And may I say that I chose to come back from Africa at this time (a gut instinct let’s say) rather than travelling onwards (majority of countries never closed borders believe it or not and many are desperate for tourists). No, my firm intention is to stay in the UK for the rest of this year, let everyone else get on with it I say. I have nothing to prove. I’m much happier among the trees and ancient places of the world, writing my stories and counting my blessings… airports and beach resorts were never my thing.
And I purposely used a lot of images from my time in England during 2020 in this post, which was by no means a less interesting or less purposeful time than my time in Africa (all things come with their own challenges of course). Every corner of our wonderful earth has its gifts. Father gave us many treasures, not least of which is our own soul, our own free will. What a gift ! What a world! Thank God ! What have you all chosen to do with your time?
But I have one request… one little complaint…
Where, oh where, is your love?
I have seen it, everywhere, especially in West – people dragging people down. What have we been driven to? Fear of losing your life is more important to you than losing your humanity? Losing your kindness? Losing your love? Since when was criticising others so acceptable? That person you just walked past in the streets, yes they may not be wearing a mask or sticking to the ‘rules’ but what on earth has is got to do with you? You have no idea what that person may have been through in the past 12 months, who they might have lost, the problems they’re facing, the desperation they are in. We keep getting blasted with the slogan “we are all in this together” well let me say, yes we are! So let’s make sure we do it with love, with compassion, because I tell you something, unless we do we are heading to a dark place indeed… and this is just the beginning my friends…
The world may be a little dark of late, but that doesn’t mean you can’t shine your light. All of you, each one of you, are valuable, are valued, are needed. The world needs you, it needs your love, it needs your humanity, now, desperately, more than ever.
One thing I know for sure, I will die for love, before the end… it will be necessary. I am in love, nothing can take that away from me, and it is a love I will give to the world. I would love you to join me. The ship is almost leaving…
p.s. I am not dead! I am very happy to be alive and have started working on two books, one for children and one for adults. I still have many stories that I have promised to tell on this site, some old some new, and so will endeavour to do so, even if not in their fullness (I need to save some of the best bits for the adult book). I will also continue to use Instagram and have started using Youtube more, and will upload a lot more videos and short films there in the coming months. So stay in touch! And connect. #FOLLOWTHEJOURNEY