“I came into this life with humble beginnings – and I seek a humble ending. But what I look for along the way is to acquire a life worth living, a day worth getting out of bed for, a smile worth sharing, a hand worth holding. A place worth finding. I just want to look back at my time and regret only things I did do
– never something I didn’t.”
“The voice of God can be found amongst the highest mountains, and between the smallest grains of sand… if you only have the ears to hear it. The essence of a pilgrimage is to move, yet, at some point along the way, you realise you do not move at all ~ the pilgrimage moves you.”
“People have called me many things, given me many titles, accolades, nicknames and honours. In fact I have called myself many things. An artist, an Aesthete, a pilgrim, a wanderer, a muse. Truth is I am not any of those things – no Christopher Columbus, Byron, Dorian Gray; not an expert traveller, adventurer, ‘nomad’ or gypsy. Neither am I a Prince, a Lord, Earl or King – yet less than that am I a peasant, a workman, vagabond or slave. I am that which I am. No more. No less.”
“I have looked in all places, behind every door and into the eyes of many worldly men. The only lasting thing I have found, of any value and perpetual comfort to my soul, is undoubted belief in God. I owe my life, and all its deeds, to He…”
Welcome to my diary… the ‘Diary of an Aesthete’.
A pilgrimage of Truth. A passage of Healing. A testimony of Faith.
This is my Global Pilgrimage ~ the story of my life, and the people who have become a part of my story along the way.
Ever looked at the night sky and seen the milky way with your bare eyes, heard the sounds of the deep jungle with your own ears, or left your shoes far behind as you ran through the hot desert barefoot? If you have, then you know that there is more to this life than we are lead to believe, that there is a deeper Truth to uncover… that there is more to this human race and the forces of our nature than the forces of man will ever want you to realise. Some of us realise this. Some of us take this gift of life and run with it. Deep down, in our soul, all of us were Born Free. It is time to remember… Do not let the Devil feast on your freedom…
“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” – Matthew 7.7
This has been a journey both within and without. I have searched the world, I have search my soul. It hasn’t always been easy or comforting. I have found many things, tested my waters with oil ~ looked hard within for Truth of my making, through all its pain, smoke and mirrors. Artists are witnesses to Creation, not the makers. I have learnt that knowing thyself is key to being a pure vessel, to being as open and forgiving as possible… ~ “When you come to know yourselves, then you will become known, and you will realise that it is you who are the sons of the living father. But if you will not know yourselves, you dwell in poverty and it is you who are that poverty.”
– Jesus Christ.
Everywhere there are signs.
Do not blind yourself.
I am not these deeds or these illusions. This journey is my past and I do not belong to it, as indeed I do not belong to my future. This part of my life has been a voyage of healing and a seeking of Truth. I am not the power behind anything you see. There is only One power in the Creation. I am merely a man of faith, who believes and sees the goodness in all he can, who is grateful for this gift of life granted by the Father. I am someone with an intense passion for Humanity, and Creation… for voyage, and the metamorphosis of travel. Yet more than I am, I am not. For everyday I am learning… and everyday I am changing.
My journey to God has been long and winding, and I will always be thankful for the time I have been given to seek and find answers for myself. The world has many ways, and the eyes have many ways to see… to illuminate, and to blind.
Along the way I have sun-danced with Druids, sung solos in Gospel choirs, dined with modern-day ‘prophets’, African kings, chieftains and Fetish Priests alike, once played drums at a Voodoo ritual (never again), walked the deepest desert and fasted with Muslim friends, lived with Saharan Berbers, celebrated the blessing of marriage with Hindu friends, took a solo pilgrimage through Israel and prayed at all the most holy sites of Jerusalem; one time woke-up in the middle of a pagan ritual.
I have bathed with wild elephants and swam alone in the middle of the Indian jungle, fed sacred monkeys by hand in Ghana with the help of Bagbor tribesman, kissed an adult crocodile in the Gambia, caught a wild cobra in India (two actually), walked with adult lions through the West African Bush, free and equal, no chains, collars or drugs. Danced in Rome’s oldest fountain, swam naked in West Africa’s highest waterfall, was granted exclusive access to explore a ruined Hindu temple, got a surprise invitation to an ancient Roman amphitheatre, once had the Sistine Chapel all to myself… experienced the deepest healing by a Living Saint on a mount in Athens and had my world rocked…
I identify as Orthodox Christian – a follower and believer in the Love, Openness, Peace and true Passion of Christ and the ancient church, yet I am not fooled by the many falsehoods of Man’s modern world, of our spiritual separation, disparity, abuse of each other, our histories, and the precious Planet Earth. True faith is alive, lives and breathes, and leaves its mark on all it touches. It does not need to be justified or even testified; Living Faith is evidence of itself.
It’s funny how in life you start out on a journey with an idea, a vision – of what you should be, and what you want to become… and then life takes over. And like life itself, a journey is never what you expect it to be. It will surprise you. It will change you. Once you finally let go – strip yourself of all the baggage you’ve acquired throughout your life as a comfortably uncomfortable person, step up to your fear, your demons, and let them not block your freedom, your path or destiny, but provoke the lion in you to stand up and roar, to strike, to take life by the throat and throttle every fear out of it until you get what you want… then you’ll be ready. Then you’ll be prepared to live a life you’ve always dreamed of living. Then you’ll be free to hit the road, and leave everything you don’t need behind.
I have challenged my many fears and ran into this life with arms open wide, embracing the beautiful but constant struggle between heart and head, good and evil, pride and compassion. I have been rewarded time and time again, with every kind of beauty, emotion, colour and song. The good battle is not easy, but the high rewards are worth fighting for. Turning the mirror inwards has been the greatest teacher, freed me of fears, given me the Key… To serve Truth is empowering not lowly. I am living my life according to the whims of the Spirit, not the shackles of logic or ‘self’.
Follow the Journey.
And take your own.
See His hand in everything.
☩ ✟ ☩
Do not see, know ~
And with this knowing go blindly into the dark.
Take a leap of faith.
To The Stars…
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